Those of us who are prepared to cry at commencement are ready to do so for a number of possible reasons.

1. Joy and a heart swelling with pride at this major accomplishment.

2. Relief that it is finally over.

3. Misery because while it is the end, it is also the beginning because you’ve decided to go to graduate school.

4. Your parents calculated how much rent you can pay them now that you have a degree and will be getting a job.

5. You realize how much college has really cost you and you just want to be a kid again.

6. You’re not really done with school, you’ve just been inside the Matrix and have a year left.

7. You’ve just gone through all of this education and still have no idea what you want to do.

8. You and your college buddies are going your separate ways.

9. You found out your favorite professor actually hated your guts.

10. You can finally apply to your dream job because you have the education to do it.

Regardless of whether you cry, laugh, or just blankly stare because you’re numb, just know that you made it. Maybe it took you three, four, five or, like me, 14 years to complete. So what? This marks the end of one chapter and the beginning of another. If you have chosen to walk the stage, or if your last final is enough to signal your completion, you should be proud.

I almost didn’t participate in commencement. As a 30-something single mother, I convinced myself I was just tired of always having to pay for everything. So I told myself, and a few others who dared question my newly acquired all knowingness, the added expense of my regalia was not something I needed to shell out. As one of the students accepted into this summer’s British Documentary Experience course set for London, I stubbornly proclaimed the $92 needed for my cap and gown would go into my DreaGoesToLondon fund.

A few close friends and family faced with the task of talking sense into me swiftly knocked me down, ironically gently, from my high horse. A friend sent a text to encourage me, and my grandmother had a few words for me on Facebook, of all places. However, it was the look in my dad’s eyes when he said, “This isn’t about you,” that ultimately changed my mind.

My father smiled and nodded as I explained my reasons for not wanting to participate in commencement. He’s a great listener. He let me finish and he said, “We’ve been right there with you, we need to see you finish. Your daughter needs to see you finish.”

How can I argue with that? Well I can, but I’m not a monster. It was the, Your daughter needs to see you finish, that hit me the hardest. Fourteen years I’ve been pursuing a degree. I’ve transferred schools a couple times, but on and off I have been working on a bachelor’s since I was 19, and my daughter was 9 months old. She’ll be fourteen soon, a freshman in high school, and she has promised to cry with me and scream the loudest at the commencement ceremony on Saturday.

While I have been largely financially responsible for myself and my daughter, that doesn’t mean I didn’t have support. Throughout my various transitions in life, the breaks from school I’ve needed in order to take care of my child and myself, my family and closest friends have been there.

They’ve watched me grow, watched me cry, cried with me, prayed for me, prayed with me, laughed with me, hugged me when I needed it. They’ve been there through it all. My dad helped me realize that this is their commencement too. Every person that has ever supported me on this journey, whether the way has been large or small, will walk the stage with me.

This is not to make those who have chosen not to walk for whatever reason feel bad, or feel like you’ve missed out. I encourage all to do what is best for you. However at least take a minute to acknowledge and appreciate this milestone.

Not everyone in college comes in right out of high school; I know this because I didn’t come to CSUEB until I was in my late 20s. Some students have already had careers, or came back to school to tie up loose ends. That’s great. Once you’ve finished take a breather. Not all of us can afford to run off on a vaycay or do nothing right after graduation. At least take a few days and let your brain relax, pick a show to binge watch on Netflix.

However you choose to celebrate, or not celebrate, at least take some time to brainstorm the title of the newest chapter coming up in your life. You may not acknowledge it now, but no matter the amount of time it took you to complete, your undergraduate degree is a huge accomplishment. It’s okay to revel in it.